I have obviously been a part of such groups in the past. Left in disgust and could totally relate to a lot mentioned here. I really don’t know when will this change but I sure know this post is going to a lot of uncles I know who refuse to acknowledge they are uncles and still a part of misogynistic groups sharing girls getting slapped videos et al.
I am a part of just one whatsapp group. It is the best whatsapp group so all this doesn’t happen there. I wish more groups like that whatsapp group. Groups mein Groups, Parag Group.
Now when I think of the 'jokes' I used to find funny, not only as an adolescent but even as a youngish adult eons ago, make me cringe and dislike myself. I console myself by thinking - well you dislike the then you, something must have turned out right. But that is not enough, calling out 'locker room' rubbish is important, and I have tried to do that. The only problem for me is that I am now not part of ANY whatsapp group of ONLY male friends from university or school. Come to think of it, it is not a problem at all :)
Another piece that resonates with me. And should be compulsory reading for us men, specially the fence sitters who know what they hear aren't right and yet don't have the courage or logic to call these out.
My attempts at calling out these jokes too have always been feeble.
Thanks Mahima. Ashamedly so, about 10 years back when I got the chance to attend my first stand up comedy show, I laughed at all the jokes as sexist as they were. In fact, my lasting memory of that was, older and more influencial women in the company asking the comedian to leave the stage and go, and me without really understanding the issue, thinking the older women are really stuck up. Later I started raising my voice for various modes of "entertainment" considered the norm in a male led sales department. I didn't quite get it then, but having more representation, and ability to voice concerns where you are, can impact a culture. Though you have taken the gender view of the WhatsApp group, sensitivity of language is part of good humour. It's just that really good humour also does it all, puts light on a real issue in a light manner, and not really works to bring down people. Lovely insight ❤️
So cool of you to share it as it is. All of us have laughed at some point in time because we didnt know any better. So glad you shared this here. What I am inarticulately trying to say is —-> + 1
Thank you and more power to you for that honest share. I think we've all been there. And that's okay. What matters is that we move on from there as we grow and evolve. You've done that, and how!
A heated discussion amongst women in a whatsapp group on the Delhi Boys Locker group topic lead to exits from that group. I agreed with both sides and respected thier viewpoints but it escalated quickly and disproportionately.
Often we men get a Womansplaining type of discourse on sensitivity when such topics are raised. Yeah.. this happens.. we know.
Are such jokes allowed or not? Are such jokes allowed or not in presence of specific people? Have these specific people evolved to a higher level or do they have an handicap which lets them accept such things?
Jokes are subjective and relative. Not everyone will enjoy every kind of jokes... Me for instance... I hate toilet and Poop humor... My kid loves it... But your closest friends would not mind even disgusting jokes from you. And you would too roll your eyes and move on....
But point is where do you draw the line... And where does a joke turns into abuses and taunts.
Thanks for another great perspective into the lives of the fairer sex.
I have obviously been a part of such groups in the past. Left in disgust and could totally relate to a lot mentioned here. I really don’t know when will this change but I sure know this post is going to a lot of uncles I know who refuse to acknowledge they are uncles and still a part of misogynistic groups sharing girls getting slapped videos et al.
I am a part of just one whatsapp group. It is the best whatsapp group so all this doesn’t happen there. I wish more groups like that whatsapp group. Groups mein Groups, Parag Group.
Uncles ji ko pranaam 🙏🏼
I wonder what group this is. You only mention it 37 times a day 🤭
Good one Mahima.
Now when I think of the 'jokes' I used to find funny, not only as an adolescent but even as a youngish adult eons ago, make me cringe and dislike myself. I console myself by thinking - well you dislike the then you, something must have turned out right. But that is not enough, calling out 'locker room' rubbish is important, and I have tried to do that. The only problem for me is that I am now not part of ANY whatsapp group of ONLY male friends from university or school. Come to think of it, it is not a problem at all :)
We've all been there, Makarand. I used to do this too. What matters is we grew out of it, thankfully, and hopefully will help others do the same!
Another piece that resonates with me. And should be compulsory reading for us men, specially the fence sitters who know what they hear aren't right and yet don't have the courage or logic to call these out.
My attempts at calling out these jokes too have always been feeble.
There is a reasonable limit to how long a battle we can wage each time we see such a joke. As long as you did it, that's all that matters. :)
I loved this piece Mahima! Great work!
Thank you for your contribution to this one Puneet!
Thanks Mahima. Ashamedly so, about 10 years back when I got the chance to attend my first stand up comedy show, I laughed at all the jokes as sexist as they were. In fact, my lasting memory of that was, older and more influencial women in the company asking the comedian to leave the stage and go, and me without really understanding the issue, thinking the older women are really stuck up. Later I started raising my voice for various modes of "entertainment" considered the norm in a male led sales department. I didn't quite get it then, but having more representation, and ability to voice concerns where you are, can impact a culture. Though you have taken the gender view of the WhatsApp group, sensitivity of language is part of good humour. It's just that really good humour also does it all, puts light on a real issue in a light manner, and not really works to bring down people. Lovely insight ❤️
So cool of you to share it as it is. All of us have laughed at some point in time because we didnt know any better. So glad you shared this here. What I am inarticulately trying to say is —-> + 1
Thank you and more power to you for that honest share. I think we've all been there. And that's okay. What matters is that we move on from there as we grow and evolve. You've done that, and how!
A heated discussion amongst women in a whatsapp group on the Delhi Boys Locker group topic lead to exits from that group. I agreed with both sides and respected thier viewpoints but it escalated quickly and disproportionately.
Often we men get a Womansplaining type of discourse on sensitivity when such topics are raised. Yeah.. this happens.. we know.
Are such jokes allowed or not? Are such jokes allowed or not in presence of specific people? Have these specific people evolved to a higher level or do they have an handicap which lets them accept such things?
Jokes are subjective and relative. Not everyone will enjoy every kind of jokes... Me for instance... I hate toilet and Poop humor... My kid loves it... But your closest friends would not mind even disgusting jokes from you. And you would too roll your eyes and move on....
But point is where do you draw the line... And where does a joke turns into abuses and taunts.
Thanks for another great perspective into the lives of the fairer sex.